Postsecret review 29

I contemplated getting to this earlier in the week, but that didn't end up actually happening. So here we are. Also, I'm aware that it's probably mostly pointless to write these because I doubt anyone reads them, yet I still feel compelled enough to spout off my thoughts about (some of) the various secrets each week. 

"my mother doesn't speak to me because i threatened to call the 'intervention' show on her hording of 46 cats in her house." [over a photo of like 15 cats inside a house somewhere]

This one is one of the more unique ones, I think. The whole situation with the hoarding of 46 cats is rather singular.

"I was having sex with my coworker when my husband texted happy valentines day" [over what appears to be a valentine card like the sort children exchange with classmates in elementary school; the "happy valentines day" text is part of the card although I assume it is also meant to be part of the secret]

As you know, the secrets that have to do with affairs are interesting to me. I wonder if the person who wrote this secret has any regrets about the affair they're partaking in? Or maybe they are shamelessly and gleefully enjoying the affair.

"I used to think everyone could see my thoughts in a bubble over my head." [in a thought bubble over a drawing of a person] 

I wonder at what age a child might think this (or at least I assume that this occurred when the person was a child).

"I think our couple's therapist has a crush on us... Somehow it doesn't feel weird at all!"

I wonder how common this is. And how this person who wrote the secret can tell (or at least why they assume so) that the therapist has a crush on them.

"To the man who held my hand & made sure my son was okay when I totalled my car 9 years ago, I'm sorry I didn't ask your name, But I will never forget your kindness." [over a card that says thanks]

I like this secret because of this rather poignant moment of kindness it portrays. 

"A few years ago my husband celebrated his 25th year of teaching. After touching the lives of hundreds of students not one RSVP'd to his surprise party. We had to cancel. He never knew it. He loves his job. I hate it."

I wonder why none of the students wanted to come to the surprise party. This is somewhat of an interesting scenario. 

"If a patient is rude to me or mean to his family, I used the largest gauge needle I have to inject him. If a patient is nice, I use a baby needle."

This seems... unethical.

"I wonder if I will ever get over the loss of my friend? He didn't die. My husband told him to never contact me again." 

It seems that secrets often leave me with additional questions because they don't include suffcient detail. In this case, the question is why the husband never wants the friend to contact the spouse again. Perhaps the husband is worried that the friend wants/is trying to have an affair with the spouse? Who knows.

"my downstairs neighbor and i have screaming matches to see who's the loudest during sex. i usually win."

I wonder what the other neighbors think. This seems sort of... inconsiderate, to say the least. And tacky. Although maybe they live in a duplex and therefore are each other's only immediate neighbors sharing a floor/ceiling.

"I want to be skinny... but I am far too lazy."

I can relate to this. Probably many people can relate to this. Wanting to lose weight but being too lazy to actually put in the effort to make it happen...

"I was off my meds when I broke up with you. I had to go back on them to live with what I'd done" [over a photo of hands holding pills in them]

Makes me wonder what kinds of meds they were/are, and also more of the context surrounding this breakup. I guess perhaps it was so bad that there was no chance of them getting back together??

Valentines Postsecret review 28

This week, the secrets are generally Valentine-themed. And what a surprise, I'm getting quite the a [I began writing this post on Sunday] head start on reviewing them (mostly or at least partly as a way of avoiding doing other things, but in any case)...

"I am in love with her/She will unintentionally break my heart./But I can't turn off this feeling.//Even though I know it won't ever be returned,/And even though I know I will get hurt,/Loving her is the best thing that's ever happened to me./No amount of heartache could ever make me regret this feeling."

This doesn't seem like the healthiest relationship, but what do I know... I mean, I guess love isn't always the most rational of motivations, but still. Maybe the person who wrote this is a decently normal and acceptable person, but I also get a slight sense that they could perhaps be a little bit of a creep. It just seems like a slightly obsessive way of writing about someone in the secret. 

"I have hidden gumdrops in the glove box of my car. I'm 66."

I can understand this (there's no age limit on enjoying candy), although I wonder about the climate that this person lives in. If it gets too warm, the gumdrops might melt (hopefully they're in a container?). 

"When you're hot, everyone tells you that being a good person is enough, that someone will love you for who you are/It's the cruelest lie I have ever been told."

Interestingly, this is not the only secret I can recall seeing that had to do with a supposedly-attractive person complaining about the downsides of being "too" good-looking. I wonder how good-looking one has to be in order to have these sorts of problems? Does the fact that I haven't had these problems mean that I'm not good-looking? (I think a fair opinion of myself is that I'm at least average-looking and not horrifically ugly) 

"I am equally excited + terrified to learn who I am without you" 

This one is relatively short and simple although I like the feeling it conveys; it seemed like something a bit different than usual.

"My boyfriend started sleeping with his wife again./Happy Valentines Day" (on a Pantone color card, number 493, which is a shade of pink)

The whole concept of people having affairs and such is one that I find sort of fascinating for some reason, which is why this secret caught my eye. I wonder if the secret means the affair is coming to an end, or if now the guy is going to sleep with his wife while still continuing the affair?

"i wish you still loved me the way you did when we drove down this road in montauk" (over a photo of what is presumably the road mentioned in the secret)

This one has that vague and sort of wistful A Softer World feeling to it that occasionally comes up in these secrets. 

"NO one SENDS you FLOWERS when You are Crazy!"

I wonder if this is a secret referring to the personal experience of the person who wrote it (as in, they are crazy and no one sends them flowers) or if it's supposed to be in reference to other people who are crazy and therefore won't be sent flowers... it's ambiguous. 

in the form of a memo: "Company Name Here/Memo/To: I'm just the receptionist./From: Your family owns the company./CC: I could have any number of better jobs with my MBA and $100,000 college education./Date: But I stay.../Re: because of how you smile at me every morning when you come in the door./Message: I secretly love you." With an additional comment added beneath: "In regards to the love lorn receptionist who stays in her job because of the guy's smile. I recently quit a position because I made a pro and con list after I was offered a new job. I realized that her smile was the only pro item I cared about on my list."

Like I mentioned in a comment on a previous secret, I guess love isn't always the most rational of motivations. I feel like if I were actually in a relationship with someone and that precluded finding a better job for some reason (would have to move away? etc) then maybe I would remain in the lesser job, but just being secretly in love with someone whose family owns the company while I'm a receptionist... not so compelling, for me. I wonder how many other people work in jobs that they only stay in because they're secretly in love with someone else at the workplace... maybe more than I might think? 

"I wanted her so bad, until I saw her feet. Sorry." (with a drawing of ugly feet and hairy legs)

This reminds me of that one Seinfeld episode where there's a woman who has "man hands," which Jerry doesn't find appealing. Actually, apparently this occurs in multiple episodes.

"I gave my boyfriend a shoebox and asked him to decorate it so that when I broke up with him the next month I would have something to store his knicknacks in" (around a photo of a shoe)

This seems rather cold and calculating. And kind of twisted in a weird way too. Not something I would do.

"I wear [obscured] my right hand around my PARENTS... he's not my boyfriend... he's my fiance." (over a photo of a ring on a left hand)

I wonder why the parents would perhaps not approve of this person's fiance. Maybe they're a gay couple? 

"I graduated from High School in 1967. So did the girl I love, she never knew. Now, 2 marriages, 1 war, and 40 years later, I can honestly say: 'There has not been a day in the last 40 years, that I have not thought of her with love and regret.'"

This sounds... rough. 

"I still don't believe you love me." (written on a Tiffany & Co. receipt for a "Diamond by the Yard pendant" which cost $17300 plus tax for a total of $18748.88)

I really wonder how rich these people are. And why the secret writer still doesn't believe the other person loves her, even in light of this very extravagant purchase/gift. 

"I was going to tell you/but then you left" (over a photo of a train at an outdoor station)

presumably the thing that was going to be said (but wasn't actually said) was related to love. I wonder what happened to these people? Did the secret writer ever end up telling the person whatever it was at some point in the future?

"I Don't Tell HIM But Flowers Are A WASTE" 

Maybe this actually would be a good thing to share with the him referenced in this secret. Communication is everything, people. 

"it's too soon, and you aren't going to ask. but, for the record, I would say, 'yes.'" (over an interesting illustration of two vultures next to the carcass of a bear; one vulture has the bear's heart in its beak, dripping with blood)

I thought the illustration was interesting. 

Postsecret review 27

 kinda late on this one again... *sigh* But anyways, here goes.

"I haven't had physical touch in a while, so I've been booking dentist appointments. I fantasize about my dentist during procedures." (over an image that appears to be from the angle of inside a mouth, with dentists visible in the background outside of the mouth)

This... is not the method I'd choose of trying to get some physical touch. That is what professional cuddling services are for. Or find a relationship? Hire a prostitute? Get a massage or get one's hair done? A manicure or pedicure, even? Also, I feel like dentist appointments are more of an occasional thing and it might be odd to schedule too many of them in short succession? Maybe this person's teeth are messed up enough that it's warranted though and they actually need more and more procedures to be done. I would also think this might get sort of expensive, so perhaps they're rich and/or have good dental insurance...  

"I reported ppl I used to do living history with to the FBI bc they were at the insurrection" (surrounding an illustration of a bunny holding a flower in a cute style)

J wonder what it's like to do living history and then also what it's like to do it with people who later end up participating in an insurrection... 

"For the first time in my life (40 years old) I'm excited about the things I want to do and NOT anxious about things I think I should be doing"

This is a good and more uplifting secret, interestingly. I guess it's perhaps a bit unfortunate that it took this person so long to be excited about the things they want to do, but at least they got to that point eventually?

"Secretly, I love getting them tightened because the pain is so AROUSING!" (over a photo of someone getting braces adjusted)

I'm including this one in the review because it relates thematically to a prior secret. I sort of wonder if this person gets into any BDSM stuff, seeing as apparently they find pain arousing (but does that apply only to teeth pain or pain in general anywhere on the body?). 

"For our sanity - we've nicknamed all of our daycare children..." (on a pink background over a series of smile stickers which are labeled with the nicknames, such as: Duh!, Baby Duh!, Lesbo, Gus, F.J. [Fat Joe], Screamer, snot-boy, L.B. {Little Bastard})

This is... different. Although I suppose I can understand it, sort of. Presumably they don't actually call the children these names to their faces, but who knows...

"I spend a lot of time making my boring life look exciting on Facebook" (over an illustration of some people at a party or something, with the words "for her new and hot fiction" collaged over it)

It is interesting to me how this secret demonstrates a bit of self-awareness, although not to the point of this person deciding to stop trying to portray their boring life as exciting on Facebook. 

"When I fight with my Marine Corps father... I feel like describing all the gay sex I've had." 

I wonder how that would transpire, if the secret writer did end up describing all that during a fight with their father...

"on career day I wanted to dress as a circus performer. mom sent me to school with a briefcase. i was 8." (over a drawing of a circus performer standing on the back of a horse)

I wonder if the person continued to want to become a circus performer later in life, or if it was merely a childhood desire? 

"I keep these MENSA puzzle cards in plain view when I host parties so my guests will not assume I am thick simply because I never finished university" (over I guess what are some of the puzzle cards in question)

This person seems a bit insecure based on the fact that they do this thing with the puzzle cards. I wonder if they can actually solve the puzzle cards or not? 

That's the end of my commentary for this batch of secrets... new ones will be up tomorrow, but who knows when I'll get around to reviewing those! I've never actually sent in a secret myself, although a few times I did contemplate it, but ultimately decided not to. 

Postsecret review 26

 Getting this one done a little earlier than usual...

"I hate that I know what your wife likes in bed. Even more, I hate that we like the same things. So when you're doing them to me, I can't help but imagine you doing them to her." (over a photo of a blindfolded woman with a finger to her lips)

Oh fun, another secret that has to do with affairs. I am wondering about how the writer found out what the wife likes in bed, whether this was from talking to the wife (maybe they're friends?) or the husband talking about what his wife likes... 

"Antique furniture scares me" (over a torn out image depicting various antique furniture arranged in a grid)

I really wonder why exactly it scares them, yet at the same time, somehow I can kind of understand this...

"I keep hoping I'll see my brother in law in one of these images so I can turn him in and give my sister a second chance" (over a photo of the Capitol insurrection rioters)

This one is kind of interesting because it provides a small look into some more individual/personal dynamics of this situation. I wonder if the writer did end up seeing their brother in law in a photo and turning him in?

"today i realized i could no longer remember what you were like when you still loved me" 

This one, aesthetically and thematically, is vaguely reminiscent of A Softer World, so that's what I find interesting about it. I also sort of like how it is a bit melancholy.  

"When you are being unreasonable, I put you on mute and scream obscenities at you" (over a photo of a man holding a telephone and screaming with an angry expression on his face)

While I can see how this would be cathartic, it also seems like it could potentially go wrong if the phone happened to actually not be on mute while the obscenity-screaming took place...

A selection of secrets, while not inherently that interesting to me by themselves, are slightly more interesting when looked at together:

"After my son was born I secretly wished he would die so I could have my life back / Now I would give my life so he could live / I never knew I could love someone so much" (over an image of a newborn baby in the hospital) / "I'm afraid that I won't be strong enough to raise my son to be the man that his father failed to be." 

It is interesting to me how these secrets both have to do with reflections on parenting. The first one is a positive reflection, that the writer ended up loving their son more than they expected even though they initially secretly wished the son would die. The second one is more of a worry about the writer's ability to be a good parent to their son. There were a couple of other secrets about parenting as well: "I could of been a father... but I was to scared" / "He still loves us, even after I told him it wasn't his..."

"I have always wanted an Afro" / "I feel like I have to work harder to look pretty because my hair is curly" / "I feel like the people that see me with straight hair see a fake me" 

These all have to do with hair texture, curly hair in particular. It seems that all the people who wrote these secrets have some hangups about their hair texture... (particularly the last two, perhaps not necessarily the first one as much)

Postsecret review 25

It seems that I don't get to these until the very end of the week right before the next week's secrets are posted. I did sort of intend to try and do this one earlier, but it didn't happen until now.

"My son's 17 year old friend wants to screw me. I'm a 46 year old woman. I want to screw him too." (over a postcard that says "oh baby, baby" and with an illustration of Britney Spears, which I had to look up to be sure that it was her)

This is also another one of those secrets that very possibly might not end well if it were to actually happen. Maybe at least they should wait until the kid is 18. Even then, not necessarily a good idea... although for some reason this scenario doesn't exactly seem like it's entirely unheard of.  

"i still don't know how i feel when i think about the fact that i;m the last person you chose to text before you killed yourself. at first i was horrified, and then in a weird way i was flattered but now i'm angry that you put that pressure on me, that i have to live with for the rest of my life." (typewritten text)

This one is rather dark and depressing. I can imagine that it might be rather... unsettling to be in the situation that this secret-writer is in. I do kind of wonder what the person who died said in the text(s) just prior to their death.   

"I'm in my 30's and I induced lactation so I can breastfeed grown men -- It's so intimate and satisfying." (over a grid of photos of women's bare breasts)

This one is bizarre and I can safely say that this is not a thing I'd do myself. I'm not nor do I want to be a milk machine/fountain for various grown men to drink from as they please. I wonder if or how much this woman charges for men to breastfeed from her? You couldn't pay me enough. Well, maybe a few grand per man, and they only get 5 or 10 minutes... yikes, I've just grossed myself out thinking about that entirely theoretical idea. Imagine if men did this in reverse, for women to breastfeed from them...   

"When I was little, I thought the 'milk man' was a glass of milk with arms and legs." (over a collage of a glass of milk with little human arms on the sides and legs)

This one is amusing and I like the collage of this person's childhood idea of what a milkman was.

"I took my family on a road trip during covid and now my daughter will have health issues for the rest of her life. It wasn't worth it." 

That's quite a lesson to have learned the hard way...

"I tell my friends I do coke because I like the way it feels. I do coke because I like how it feels to be thin."

None of my friends have told me that they do coke. But I guess if they did, I should try and remember to inquire about their reasons for doing it. 

"When I'm on a chair lift I look down and guess whether I'd die, live, or break my leg if the chair fell at that exact moment." (over a photo of a ski lift and an arrow pointing to a certain chair labeled "I'd die here")

I like this one because it is rather unique and also has a pleasingly morbid air to it.

"Whenever people ask me for directions I always direct them to a strip club." 

I'm really not a fan of maliciously messing with other people like this just for the heck of it. Those people probably would've just liked to know how to get to their intended destination. If I'm going to intentionally make someone's life more difficult or annoy them, it'll be because they deserve it. 

"When I am behind a bad driver with disabled plates, I think to myself... driving like that is probably how you got those plates..." (over a photo of the wreckage from a car crash)

Snarky and kind of morbid. I... actually have not thought this about people who drive badly and happen to have disabled license plates.

"I imagine that your long nose hairs are spiders crawling out of your nose" (over a photo/image of a nose with spider legs drawn coming out of the nostrils)

I, for one, am glad that I don't spend enough time looking closely enough at people's noses to notice if they have long spideresque nose hairs or not. Long nose hairs are gross, honestly. Trim them. 

Postsecret review 24

Saturday night, secret-reviewing time! Just in time before new secrets get posted tomorrow. So here goes.

"Sucking my boobs is not a turn on. GAME OVER" (with a drawing of Mario)

I feel like maybe this would've been more useful to actually tell the person it refers to? Instead of sending it into Postsecret. Communication is everything when it comes to sex and/or relationships. 

"I wish my life insur[ance] paid for my suicide" (written in like stickers or something over dollar bills -- in denominations of 50, 20, 10 and 5: two of each)

This is kind of a depressing secret. Although perhaps there are methods that would make it look enough like an accident so that life insurance would cover it? 

"I owe my wonderful life to a man I don't even know; the man who stole my wife 40 years ago. To you sir, cheers!" 

I wonder if this means the person remained unmarried after the wife was stolen, or if he married someone else/different instead and then had a wonderful life with them? The whole concept of wife-stealing and affairs and all that fascinates me for some reason.

"I am a very talented hacker but I only use my skills to steal family photo's off of stranger's computers" (over a photo of some people, a couple presumably, with a date of 2-15-2006)

This is sort of a bizarre secret. I wonder what this person's motivation is for going after the family photos on strangers' computers -- what do they like about or get out of it?

"The day I found out I passed the bar exam, a little part of me died. And everybody celebrated." (beneath a graduation photo, presumably from law school, of a woman)

The implication I get from this one is that the person perhaps wanted to pursue a different career instead of law, and it makes me wonder what this other thing was that they presumably had to eschew in order to become a lawyer.

"Whenever I spend more than $1000 at a store, I always steal something small, just to get my moneys worth, I think the sales people know most of the time." (over a tag that says Chloe)

Naughty. 

"I work at an adolescent psych hospital... ...and I have feelings for one of my patients."

This seems like the sort of thing that probably wouldn't end well.

"I need these pills to have sex with my wife but not with my boyfriend" (over a label/packaging from Viagra)

Saucy. I wonder how the wife in this scenario feels, and if she knows about the boyfriend or even has any suspicions. Maybe she is disappointed by the fact that her husband needs to us Viagra with her?

"I ride the train because you fall asleep on my shoulder" (over a Northeast Illinios commuter rail ticket)

This is a very sweet and transit-oriented secret.

"I am more comfortable sleeping with strangers than I am touching myself" (over a closeup photo of a person's, perhaps a woman's, collarbone)

I don't really understand how this could be the case/can't relate to this at all. 

"I think if I were less attractive I'd have a better sense of who I really am"

I wonder how attractive one has to be in order for them to feel that it has hindered their sense of who they really are? Maybe it just means that I'm not attractive enough for that to have happened... I guess the implication here is that other people only like the person for their looks and so a large portion of their identity/sense of self is wrapped up in their appearance?

"I put myself thru college by having sex with men that look like [arrow pointing to an old-ish man in a photo] and every time I see one, I still think to myself 'He looks like a trick'"

a) I wonder if this resulted in catching any STDs, although b) I suppose people do what they have to do, and in this case, good for this person for being able to put themselves through college, even if it came by way of prostitution?

Postsecret review 23

 And here's another one. Many of the new/current secrets were boring, so these come from the classic secrets.

"I have furniture for a lifestyle I no longer have." This one is vague but it makes me wonder what caused the former lifestyle to go away. A divorce or something or what? 

"Before I cook -- I spank myself w/ the spatula!!" (over a photo of a chef in a kitchen) This is bizarre and I hope the person only does it when they're cooking for themselves... 

"I'm not mad that my boyfriend broke up with me. I'm PISSED that he didn't give me the boots he already bought for me for Xmas before he dumped me!" (over a drawing of a blue high-heeled boot) Materialistic much? I also wonder what he did with the boots after breaking up with this person.

(written in all-caps handwriting, above a drawing of Lionel Messi with blank/fully white eyes) "just at the peak of every orgasm, I send the energy to Lionel Messi so he can use it in his beautiful play." what. the. fuck. 

"I purposely left this in your car so I knew I'd for sure see you at least once more..." (over an image of a book cover of a book titled This Is Not A Book) I like this one because it seems sort of sweet, I guess, and if I were cleverer (and had a fitting situation) perhaps I would do something like this as well. 

"As editor of my school's yearbook, I would put ugly pictures of people who were mean to me." Petty, but I suppose I can understand doing this.